Angle to Key West: Wally Wars (9/28)


Shore of Lac du Milieu – September 28, 2013

One portage left, Wally. One last jump to make.


Why are you spinning around in a swivel chair and screaming like Admiral Ackbar. Calm down.

“All craft, prepare to retreat!”

We won’t get another chance at this, Wally. We only have to cross the Savanne, that’s it. After that, all the portages actually exist.

“But our cruisers can’t repel firepower of that magnitude!”

Wally, calm down, I know it has been rough and Star Wars is your happy place, but this isn’t a galaxy far, far away. It’s just a swamp.

“Yoda lived in a swamp.”

That was Dagobah. Come on, it will be an adventure.

“Hmm! Adventure. Hmmpf! Excitement. A Jedi craves not these things.”

Good thing we aren’t a Jedi. Come on, how bad can it be?

“Have you seen my repair list? Oh, I don’t have one because it is everything. It’s like Alderan post Death Star.”

Like millions of voices suddenly crying out in terror and suddenly silenced? Don’t you think that’s a little overblown.

“Arms. Repair. Shoulders. Repair.”

Stay on target!

“Neck. Repair.”

Stay on target!

“Back. Repair. Legs. Repair.”

Stay on target!

“Feet. Repair. Hands. Repair. Shins. Repair.”

Ok, fine, Gold Leader. I’ll tell you what. How about we give Han a bit more time to get those shields down. What do you say? It’s going to rain. We’ll take the day off. I won’t move a hundred feet and you fix everything.

“We seem to be made to suffer. It is our lot in life.”

So you’re in?

“I’ll give it a try.”

Do or do not, Wally, there is no try.

“Ok, do, but I’ll need help!”

That’s the spirit, Wally! Tell me what you need and you got it!

“I need spoonfuls of Nutella, a few hunks of Wim’s summer sausage, and a date with one of your cute dancer friends.”

I can get you two of the three, how’s that sound?





“Now witness the firepower of this fully armed and operational battle station.”

What was that?

“Nothing. Sit down and quit moving around. I’ve got a job to do.”

I can’t even go into Tosche Station to pick up some power converters?

“Watch your mouth kid, or you’ll find yourself floating home.”

I love you, Wally.

“I know.”

6 thoughts on “Angle to Key West: Wally Wars (9/28)

  1. I have often wondered why Yoda, all-knowing, all enlightened and all-intelligent, had such problems with the most basic concepts of English grammar. Don’t misunderstand me, I liked the little, hairless (sort of) guy, but couldn’t he befriend an English teacher somewhere in the galaxy so far away? Wally, you the best be!I

  2. Yup. You’re days in the bush are start’n to add up. Safe journey 🙂

    From: Techie device of one sort or another…..


  3. Wouldn’t it be great if another trail angel in the form of a massage therapist showed up, like the guy who knew about the Pipeline? Wally would appreciate the help!

Comments are closed.